March and the Search for Meaning
If January is about fixing your self and February is about fixing your relationship then March is an undeclared month off. Anything goes in March which is the month of National Caffeine Awareness, National Celery Month, and, oh yeah, National Women’s History Month. (Did you know that? I didn’t know that. Thank goodness for Saturday Night Live, my primary news source.)
One thing March isn’t about is fixing. It’s almost like an agreed upon break because, well, you-know-who is coming up right around the corner! (Yep, that’s right — April. Like January on speed. Brace yourself.)
I’m kind of feeling March as our month. The non-fixers, the hang-out-with-yourself-just-as-you-are-ers. The This Is As Good As It Gets and I Think I’m OK With It month. Or even the I-blew-through-my-resolution-and-Valentine’s-was-a-flop, at-least-let-me-take-a-moment-before-I-get-up-and-go-running-again month (welcome one and all).
Herein lies the existential discomfort with March (and days that feel like March). There’s nowhere to go, nowhere to be, nothing that you have to do or get to. You get a pass. You can do (or not do) anything you’d like. It’s a bittersweet pill of restfulness and listlessness, a true depiction of our fundamental experience of being alive, and the reason we go searching for meaning. Because when you take away everything that you have to do or fix or resolve or lose or clean or detox or prepare or plan or organize or sculpt or improve, all that’s left is to be.
To be what? Well, that’s a good question. And March is a great time to ask yourself that. If there is nothing for you to do or fix; if everything about you is good as it is in this moment; then what is there for you to do? And what if that answer is nothing?
What if there is nothing for you to do? What if all there is to do is just to be whatever you are, however you are in this moment? What if how you are right now is your Best Self? What if all there is to do is whatever you are doing in this moment (including doing absolutely nothing)?
Goals, objectives and answers have their place. But so do the immeasurable and the unknown. The thought of not fixing yourself can be rather uncomfortable; but finding comfort with the discomfort can be liberating. Freedom from fixing. Resting your resolutions. Sitting out self-improvement. Taking a month (or even just a moment) to take a break from our best selves and be our ordinary, schlubby, good enough selves.
Now that is something worth celebrating. Happy March!